iChips
by Adnama19
Summary: Ever seen that picture on Flickr? It's called "00006qez". This is my explanation of what happened. Seddie.


**A/N**: Hiya there. Anyone seen that picture? The one where you search "Nathan Kress" on Yahoo search, and it's the first picture that pops up? FF.N won't let us post links, so you either have to search it or just continue reading. Anyways, this is my explanation to what happened in that scene. (There's talk on who it is: Betty and Jughead from Archie comics, or Sam and Freddie. I personally think it's Archie, but since this is a Sam and Freddie fic then...yeah. :D)

**Disclaimer**: Sigh. Don't own iCarly. -sobs in corner- Don't own that inappropriate picture either. :D O! But I own the name "SPICY!Chippies" so no one take it. :D

* * *

"Hey," I greeted smoothly, not bothering to shut the door behind me. I walked past Carly's couch, which a certain blonde was sitting on, and proceeded to the fridge.

"Fat Cake?" I offered.

"Sure, whatever," a grunted reply came back. Sam's eyes didn't leave the TV screen.

"Where's Carly?"

"I dunno. She wasn't here when I came in."

I stopped at turned to Sam's direction. "So no one's here? You're just breaking and entering and watching TV?"

"Yup," she stated calmly, leaning on her knees with her fists clenched. "COME ON SHELBY!! YOU CAN DO IT!" She stood up and started bouncing up and down. "TAKE HER DOWN! SUCKER PUNCH HER! DO WHATEVER YOU NEED TO DO TO MAKE HER TEETH FALL OUT SO SHE TALKS LIKE ablahblahblahACK OKAY?!"

I slowly shook my head at the lost cause and grabbed two FatCakes and some soda.

"Yo dweebette, gimme some chips, will ya?" I sighed and threw down the food in front of her.

"Whatever you say, mistress."

She sighed and stood up. "Finally, FINALLY! Took you long enough to address me correctly, slave." And with a wave of her hand, she dismissed me to get her chips.

I grabbed a bag of SPICY!Chippies (odd name, yes) and threw them at her. I sat down on the couch, propping my feet up on the table and settling down.

We were silent for a moment, then Sam ripped open the bag of chips, causing me to jump slightly at the loud popping sound.

Sam gave me a withering look. "Wow. Nervous much?"

I rolled my eyes and ignored her. We continued to watch Shelby knock the first contestant's teeth out, watch her cry and run out of the octagon, and see Shelby doing some sort of victory dance. Welp, same old, same old.

When the tantalizing scent of SPICY!Chippies reached my nose, I struggled to keep myself from launching myself at Sam. After all...those were HER chippies. NO ONE can take them. Unless they wanted to die a horrible, painful, spicyish death.

After five minutes, I learned to control myself. Sam wiggled in her seat and lay down on her back, carelessly throwing her feet on my lap. I glanced at her, then gestured madly to the invading feet.

"Yes?" she asked, not even looking at me, but sensing my frantic moving.

"ExCUSE me?! Could you please remove your feet from my lap?"

"No."

I groaned in frustration and then proceeded to ignore the squirming toes covered in multi-striped socks. I wonder where she got them. As if reading my mind, she banged her ankles together and they lit up. Ah. Spencer.

Then the smell of those chips hit my nostrils again. I couldn't handle it. It was overwhelming. I dived forward, Sam jumping, startled, as I went for the bag of chips. I fell between her legs, my elbow hitting her thigh. She squealed slightly as my shoulder came in contact with her stomach and she banged me on the back with the heel of her foot. But I felt myself tipping. Sam and I fell onto the floor, her on top of me, straddling my waist. Our faces were mere centimeters away, her elbows propping her up. We silently panted into each other's faces for a moment, then she got up and plopped back down on the couch. I "oomhp"ed and sat up, triumphantly holding the SPICY!Chippies in my hand. She just scowled and rolled her eyes as I munched happily on pure barbecue spicinessspicyness.

Then I felt eyes watching me. I glanced towards Sam, but she was once again glued to the TV set. I looked to the right. Ah. There were the eyes.

Carly and Spencer were standing there, aghast, with their mouths dropped open. Carly still holding her grocery bag in her motionless hand, while Spencer was in the middle of a step. His foot floated in midair as he gasped out some words.

"What did you...just..do..."

"To Sam?" Carly finished.

"It looked like--"

"But it couldn't be--"

"It looked...wrong,.."

"But he was just trying to get chips..."

"But STILL..."

I weakly smiled and waved a hand. "Hiya..."

Carly chuckled nervously and stated in a shrill voice, "Okay, we are NEVER letting them be alone together again."

"Agreed," said Spencer slowly.

"Right, next thing we know, we could come home and they'd be makin' out!"

Sam and I looked at each other, embarrassed, and slid farther away from the middle of the couch to our respective sides.

"I'm gonna...go...now," said Spencer, dropping the three bags he held on the floor and walking in a daze to his room.

"Yeah...me too. Um. Good luck, you guys?" Carly said oddly, and ran upstairs.

I glanced at Sam, who was, once again, watching the Shelby Marx fight. I sighed.

"I'll get the CoolRanch!Chippies bag."

"Good boy," she said kindly, patting me on the back as I walked past her.

Just another day in the poor, pitiful, Sam-filled life of Freddie Benson.

You pity me, don't you?

* * *

A/N: YAY! This just CAME to me, and I wrote it in about fifteen minutes. One-shot, might do a sequel with them doing what Carly mentioned. :D Maybe...reviews? Please? :D And I have a favor...to ask...of you guys...:D

OH EM GEE MY STORY iBET SAM WAS NOMINATED FOR A UFO (UNIVERSAL FANFICTION OPEN) AWARD!!!!! Couldya vote for me? :D Maybe? Possibly? No? Yes? :) I would love you forEVER if you did. Lotsa love. Lots.

Ciao my darlings,

Adnama19


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